•  Think your image isn't good enough for the New Economy? •  Validation can build you up and give you the confidence you need.

You're not really putting yourself into your workout today. What's the trouble? Oh, you're worried that your wardrobe, your haircut, or your social background isn't right for the New Economy? Think you should get a facelift before you interview with a dotcom?

This isn't high school anymore. Try this:

Start in front of a mirror, with your feet hip width apart. Square your shoulders. Look yourself right in the eye. Say what's on your mind. It'll probably sound something like, "No one dresses like this anymore," or "Geez, look at that gray hair," or "What can I do to fix those bags under my eyes?" Play it back to yourself and listen closely. What you're really saying is something like:

• "I'm not young enough."

• "I'm not hip enough."

• "I'm not smart enough."

• "I'm not aggressive enough."

None of these things is probably true. You're looking for a new haircut or a new wardrobe the way the Scarecrow was looking for a brain in the "Wizard of Oz." You remember what happened to him: The wizard didn't give him a brain. He gave him a testimonial. That's what you're looking for, too -- validation. So give yourself some. Because if you're going to succeed, the praise must come from yourself.

Okay, that's enough with the mirror. You know what your Personal Job Trainer says: "Think yourself strong." So let's get to work on validation. Start by thinking about what you know. It's a three-parter:

• You know your trade. If you're a manager, you know how to manage. You know your industry, as well.

• You know yourself. You know what you want. And you know how to get it because you've done it before.

• You know what's important. And it's not your haircut. In the business of managing your own career, your knowledge is the raw material. If you've got it, so flaunt it. If you need more, go get it. Knowledge is low-hanging fruit -- it's easy to get it if you really want it.

Do several reps of that. But be careful. Validation is strong stuff, and you've got to be ready to handle it. It puts the responsibility for yourself back on you. It removes excuses, wipes out hiding places, eliminates waiting time.

Once you get it going for yourself, pair up with someone and work on validating each other. Regular practice on validating other people is important, because it's positive energy and it makes both of you stronger. It's the opposite of attitude. Attitude is negative energy that doesn't build you up, it breaks you down.

Here's an example. You're worried about your wardrobe, so try this on: Let's say where you work there's a software developer, a kid just out of high school who comes to work every day still dressed for gym class. You can give him attitude, or you can give him validation.

You give him attitude: You think to yourself, "Geez, what an animal, if he doesn't even know how to dress in the workplace, how can he know anything else?" And you stick your nose in the air every time you walk by him.

Or you give him validation: You say to him, "Geez, that was great work you did on that new version. I've got a conference call with a customer and could really use your help explaining a couple of things to them."

Neither attitude nor validation will change the way he dresses for work. But as validating yourself changes the way you think about yourself and your capacities, validating the software developer will change the way you think about him and his capacities. It's guaranteed to improve your chances of doing high-quality work with him.

And that, after all, is the point of this exercise: If you give validation to others they give it back - and that's what builds you up, not a wardrobe or a haircut. Now, get to work on that.